What’s wrong with UCL’s lifts?
For years, I had a crippling fear of lifts. I mean panic attack-grade fear. However, working on the 5th floor and being a thoroughly lazy bastard, I have found that recently, laziness has beat out my phobia. Ditto the fact that Goodge St tube station has lifts or 130-something steps to ascend.
Unfortunately, an incident on the lift at UCL today has done some work in resurrecting the fear. Four people got on the lift on the ground floor, pressing the button for the 2nd, 3rd 4th and 5th floor. Here is a poorly-written transcript of my journey after that…
Doors close. Lift starts moving.
Voice of the lift: “Second floor”
Doors open. Person leaves. Doors close. Lift start moving.
Voice of the lift: “Third floor”
Doors open. Person leaves. Doors close. Lift start moving.
Voice of the lift: “Fourth floor”
Doors open. Person leaves. Doors close. Lift start moving.
Voice of the Lift: “Third Basement”
Lift stops moving. Doors don’t open. I’m alone in the lift and shitting myself - not literally but nearly. Door finally opens, and the lift is about 18 inches above ground level. I leap out and scuttle off.
Third fucking basement?! The building I work in doesn’t even have a basement.