I was roused from my sleep by “the postman” who “had a parcel” for me. In my momentary lapse into dysphasia I mumbled something about being there in a minute (or at least I thought that…) and staggered into the bathroom, where I put on the first thing to hand – an ill-fitting old dressing gown belonging to the missus.

When I (finally) answered the door I discover it’s no ordinary mailman, it’s Louise’s Dad, delivering some DVDs I had ordered. And laughing heartily at my choice of morning attire. Nothing like a generous helping of humiliation to wake you up in the morning.

The accompanying photo is the stack of DVDs I acquired over Christmas. Some might say I went a bit overboard. They’re probably right.